Feeling StuckΒ 

As a mom of two kids, 3 and 11 months. I have come to find that the simplest of obstacles can cause some serious issues…😳 Number one obstacle, a not so clean house.😨 

I have found that I am getting better at trying to keep things clean on the surface, but that deep cleaning.😱 That bathroom that needs a good scrubbing,😱😱 that pile of now clean laundry just sitting there staring at you begging to be put awayπŸ˜–πŸ˜–. The pile of dirty clothes just getting bigger and bigger when it felt like you just washed a load.😭😭😭 You think to yourself I will get those things done during nap time. 😏 Plan set, ready, go…πŸ‘Œ

Until nap time comes and you are either stuck under two kids, stuck under one kid, or afraid to move altogether in fear of waking up either kid.πŸ˜₯ 

Try to wash some dishes… Hah. Here comes a loud wine from the living room. Close the washing machine door, you got a kid wondering what you are doing. Move to grab the remote and you got a 3 year old crying out loud for no real reason… She just does that from time to time. πŸ˜₯😭😭

Even typing on the phone with my 11 month old in my arms is a bit of a challenge. Sound must be turned off, even having it vibrate is a scary thought. Gah. She just moved again. 😡 True story. 

Talk about feeling stuck. It always gets me wondering about what else… She just fell off the couch…how did she go from my arms, to next to me, to leaning on the couch yet standing on the floor… Somehow she has remained asleep. πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚ kids. Gosh. Train of thought just got derailed…. 🚧

Oh… 😯 Feeling stuck about things in life. We have all been there. πŸ˜” While in between different times of our lives we often grow impatient and just start to go through the motion. Eventually the feeling of being stuck starts to set in. Stuck waiting on a phone call from that job we just interviewed for. Stuck hoping that you get a response from that guy you gave your number to. Stuck in a job you are afraid of leaving because the next one might be just as bad; if not worse. Stuck, stuck, stuck. 😞

At times like this I try to find comfort in prayer. πŸ™ My favorite verse of Psalms is “Do not worry about anything, instead pray about everything.” It’s hard to put into action of course. Some days I have to pray it over and over and over in hopes that it soothes my soul a bit. It doesn’t work all the time. But it helps. I still worry tremendously. I worry if I am making the right decisons for my girls. For my husband. For myself. 😢

I have come to realize, however, if I am not happy, how can the rest of my family be happy. Due to this realization I decided I wanted to see through opening my own business. I have always wanted to own my own. But until I had my kids I didnt really know where I wanted to put my focus on. I have finally found it in my family cafe. ✌

Now. I am playing a different waiting game.😩 Waiting on others to help me fulfill this dream. Its tough. I feel stuck. I feel impatient. I feel like a constant judgement is being placed upon me. Is it the color of my skin? Is it because I am a woman? Is it because I am a mother? I am not saying that this is what is actually happening. But it doesn’t mean it doesn’t pop in my head. 😩 

Fortunately I have the greatest support team behind me. πŸ™† Just like when my girls were born. Just like getting into and finishing college. Just like doing things outside the norm. I am not your average person. I will not think I shouldn’t do this just because it might be super hard. Hard doesn’t mean impossible. I will not stick to the norm because instead of being fearful of my dream. I am excited for it. Everyday I think of a new idea that will help me to succeed. That will help me to aid a community that is so overlooked and forgotten. I feel even more driven to make it happen. 🌞

Every day I come up with a program, a proper use method, a design element. A special detail that I believe will help my space stand out. Every night I stay up late envisioning what is to come, feeling a little disappointed that I am still stuck at the “unofficial” starting line. But. Soon enough. The pieces will fall into place and I will be able to unstick myself and begin something new and refreshing. And I can’t wait to share with you when it happens! ✌


Leave a Reply